At my classroom birthday party, circa 1980 blah something, lol
Growing up, most of my peers had their moms or both parents. I was pretty much raised by my dad. My mom wasn't dead, but my parents got divorced when I was very young and pops got custody of me. And when it came to Mother's Day, my dad would receive an early Father's Day card that I made in my class, while the kids made a card for their moms. I give my dad credit for making me the woman I am today. He was definitely a hard worker, a police officer for the City of Miami. While his schedule required him to spend nights at work, he made sure I was always taken care of and I was in the company of family, a family with women who would eventually teach me how to become a woman. Yes, my dad cooked my meals. Yes, my dad took me school and clothes shopping. Yes, I was a bit spoiled. Yes, my dad even attempted to do my hair (I have pictures to prove this). But my dad found ways to make me happy, even though we couldn't go outside and play the games a dad would with his son. Don't get me wrong, my dad has another daughter but he didn't get a chance to raise her.
My dad eventually remarried, so there was a "mother" role in my life, although it took some adjusting. I had a family, but not quite a complete one because everyone has a dysfunctional household. Even when my dad got another divorce, I still called my step-mom, "mom." I eventually realized my dad would keep his distance from me because of the type of job he had. I found out during my college graduation weekend, why my dad kept a "distance" from me. He told me that because he was a cop, if anything had happened to him, I wouldn't be as hurt because we weren't as close. Little did he know, we were very close, and I think in the back of his mind, he knew that.
My dad has always been a proud, stubborn man, but he can be emotional. In my teen years, I refused to believe I was a daddy's little girl, as I was going through that high school, rebellious phase. But after college, it dawned on me...I am a daddy's girl. I was the main girl in his life who he took care of and made sure I'd never be in harm's way. My daddy took care of me and had the responsibilities a mom would normally have.
So while many people may not have had their dads around and they may bash their "sperm donor," I have no reason to bash mine. He has always been there and still is. I think that even today, I tell my dad I love him more than I did as a young child
When I became a mother, mentally, I wasn't ready, but my husband was. And looking at my daughter having daddy time, I smile hard because I see me and my dad!
This is just my way of saying I love you dad and Happy Father's Day. And I cannot forget another important man in my life...my husband. Thank you for being there and showing your daughter what a father is. Happy Father's Day to all the men who play the part!
My kid and husband